i'm a loser, baby

i was beck's b-string guitarist once. i sat through about 20 minutes of an awful set where the band had to restart every song two or three times, and they screwed up but kept going a few times more than that. finally the a-list guitarist had to play sax in a song so i got up to play guitar. i put it on, and the song started. unfortunately, i don't actually listen to beck at all, so about 30 seconds in I screwed up an arpeggio of some sort. it was pretty minor--only a hardcore fan in the first row would have noticed--but beck stopped the song and fired me on the spot, under blue and magenta stage lights, in front of a stadium full of people, calling me all sorts of embarassing names and insulting my ability repeatedly. i wondered why it was okay for him to fuck up so many times in such a huge way, but when i lost it once i was out. it didn't really bug me that much, though, because, as I said, I don't listen to beck. i went to the bar in the back of the venue and had a drink with a girl in a tube top who was telling me in disbelief that her boyfriend had left her. "can you BELIEVE that? can you BELIEVE he just SAID that?!"