how COULD you

8/17/2007

i'd rather not elaborate on the whole thing, i guess. but i would like to record the following exchange:

Mom: [pulls me over to a corner of the church we're standing in] Katie, have you looked at Nick lately?
Me: I mean, yeah, I would hope...
Mom: Did you see what he's wearing?
Me: A suit, or maybe it's a tuxedo? I can't tell the difference when they're wearing ties.
Mom: Right, but his underwear is purple.

I am momentarily alarmed, wondering how she knows this, when I see him across the building and notice that his boxers are sticking out from the back of his pants.

Me: All right, so?
Mom: And it's woolen.

A pause. I look at her blankly.

Mom: [disgusted] Look, it's going to kill him some day, that's all I'm saying. If you're okay with that it's between you and God.

She is a textile expert, and I vaguely recall hearing something about wool underwear being poisonous over long periods of time. I'll have to warn him about that.